Sickness and Courage
by Carelna
Summary: When I turning around found you gone, scrambled after you to the house and noticed you shutting the glass door yelling me to get back I was bewildered. You wanted to protect me. Spoilers for Amplification. Chapter 2 up! Slash and M rating. Be warned! The One and the Other series.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! **

**I just got this finished. I'm not as pleased with it as I was with the Cold and the Dark. But I've decided that I will definitely be writing a Morgan/Reid series. It doesn't really have a plot and will be mostly (if not only) from Morgan's point of view and handle some things that has happened on the show or has not been shown but what could've happened. I hope this (and those yet to come) will be worth to read. **

**(The previous stories: The Cold and The Dark and The Hugs and The Cries. You don't need to read them first. Actually, you can read these in any order you want.)**

**Enjoy! **

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><p>That's the biggest difference between us. If you see someone – be it an innocent child or a blood thirsty serial killer – in distress, you run for help. You don't care about the consequences. You don't care if you get hurt. Or die even. I do. I run for help if the person is dear to me or if I'm positive that I can help the situation without risking my life. At least that's what I think. You've tried to prove me wrong – and succeeded in several occasions – but I just see more good in you than I see in myself.<p>

No matter how much I love that about you, I can't help thinking that sometimes you should stop for a second and consider your actions. Maybe that's the reason why I find it impossible to forget that one particular day that became one of the worst days of my life.

When I turning around found you gone, scrambled after you to the house and noticed you shutting the glass door I was bewildered. Yet the only thing I could see in your eyes was fear as you frantically yelled at me to get back. You wanted to protect me. Save me. You knew something I didn't. Something bad. And then when I realized the blasting air and the white powder I was once again certain that you'd be dead by the time of midnight. That moment I would have given anything to get you out of there. I didn't want to be afraid of losing you. I'd been there. Way too many times.

I was too stunned to act so it was really you who game me all the instructions of what to do. You made me call Hotch. Tell him what had happened and that you were in trouble. You made me go out to wait and after I hung up with Hotch and dialed your number. You spend more than fifteen minutes assuring me that everything was going to be alright. That I was going to be alright. It was all wrong. But hearing your calming voice was just what I needed.

Later I couldn't be proud of you even if I wanted to. You insisted on Hotch that you wouldn't go to a hospital but rather stayed were you were and try working. You were determined to find the cure even if you had to suffer through the pain and the sickness while doing so. I knew you wouldn't take the medication that was offered. You were still afraid of getting addicted. All of that was noble and brave in a way but all I thought was that you were being a fool – once again.

Hearing you cough and choke on the phone the second time made me shake all over and I wanted to rush to the laboratory you were in and force you out. You didn't need this pain. It wasn't for you to suffer. It should've been someone else. It should've been me. But it was you. You, with your impulsive decisions. And you, with your big heart that someday would become the death of you.

When they finally took you out announcing that the cure had been found and that you would be the hero of the day that no one would know about made my heart skip a beat. I was glad. Overwhelmed. You would be alright. You would be safe. And I would stay by your side. I would be there every step on the way to recovery. That sure was going to be a hell of a long way, but I knew I wouldn't regret it.

I still have no idea how did you manage to talk me away from you to help Hotch. He didn't need me I knew that but I let you to make my mind otherwise. Then, I found myself from the office with the others while you were in the ambulance coughing your lungs off and spitting blood. I didn't know that until Garcia told me and then I felt like I had betrayed you. I was ready to take one of the SUV's and drive to the hospital as fast as I could, but Hotch was quicker than me telling that he needed everyone's head on the game and that you were with people that could help you the best. I didn't try to argue. I knew you would've wanted me to go. You would've wanted me to catch this guy.

When I later arrived to the hospital asking you doctor Kimura practically rushed over me and took me with her. She didn't take me to you but sat me down to a nurses' room and explained your condition. You were probably going to be alright, but how long it would take she didn't know. You had yet to wake up after you had passed out on the ambulance. She held her hand on my shoulder as my body trembled and tears leaked from the corners of my eyes. I had been so afraid. I still was and hearing that it wouldn't go away made me feel slightly nauseous. I bowed my head trying to control my emotions, which was proving to be a hell of a hard job. She stood quietly in front of me waiting for me to stand up and demand to see you as I did quickly enough after that.

She took me to your room where I found you lying under white thin sheets. I gasped softly. You looked a lot smaller than what I was used to you looking. You were pale and barely breathing. They had you on oxygen. Wise decision, if you ask me. But then again, I wasn't the one confided in the hospital bed.

I have no idea how many hours I spent reading magazines and eating whatever the sweet nurses brought for me. At times I glanced at you hoping to see you awake, but my hopes failed me every time. You remained at deep sleep and I could only wish it to be comfortable. I talked to Hotch twice, JJ once and Garcia three times. Garcia had called Prentiss and given her updates and Hotch had informed Rossi about your state. Only one visitor at a time was allowed and I had been determined not to leave your side so they had given up and let me stay.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity I heard your voice. It was hoarse and scratchy but it was there. And it was by far the best voice I had ever heard. And at that moment the cold that had been lurking inside of me left. It disappeared as fast as it had come. I was sure it would come back sooner or later but just seeing you awake gave me hope that it would stay away quite a long time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey! Guess what? I got talked into writing slash and fluff or whatever this is. You can put the labels on for me, right? I had actually swore that I would NEVER do anything like this and look what happened. I hope I did at least an okay job. It's kind of short but hope you can manage with it. **

**Anyway, all hate (or love) about the idea can be directed straight to nannily, who came up with this. Actually, this was meant to be a thank you. :) **

**WARNINGS: This is slash. Rating is probably M. So if you're younger or don't feel up to these kind of things, leave it. I don't want to hear anyone upsetting him/herself. **

**Okay... I'm scared. Well. Here goes nothing. I haven't asked this before, but reviews, please? **

**Enjoy! **

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><p>Four days. And then you get to go home. It took a while and they warn me that it's not over yet. Still, you're ready to go home. I don't listen to you. You aren't going to stay in your apartment. Although, as far as I'm concerned this is yours as well as it's mine. I push you in with steady hand. I help the jacket off ignoring the protests and demands. I turn you around and close you in a tight embrace.<p>

I need you near. You are still weak and tired but I cannot let you slip away from me. I have to hold on to you. I don't want to hurt you but I know it hurts. You want to go and hide for the rest of your life. You feel embarrassed. With no reason. You did nothing wrong. It was your big heart acting and I know it. We all know it. You feel you've made a mistake. Maybe it's me who made you feel that. Maybe you're selling yourself short again just because of me. I told you not to do anything like that to me again. I accused you. Now I want to make it right. Whether you knew it or not.

Your scent. Soft. Powerful. Inviting. Not the hospital anymore.

Your arms around me. You smile. I smile. Your head resting against my shoulder. You won't let go. And neither will I. We stand like that. Eternity. Or it feels like it. You turn your eyes to look at me. We stare at each other. Intensively.

Your lips coming closer to mine. Connecting. Sweet and lingering kiss. Sigh. Small laugh telling how good it feels. I'm not sure if it comes from you or from me. You lick your lips. I touch yours again with mine and our tongues now slide to dance together. I feel my legs tremble. We shouldn't do it here. Not breaking the kiss gently I gently guide you towards the bedroom.

Your back hits the wall. Groan. My lips leave yours. They sweep your cheek. Ear. Chin. Neck. They stop on your collar bone. You reach for my shirt pulling me close. You back arches as I let my hands slide down your sides. They reach your hips and your knees buckle. I pick you up. I carry you to the bed. Lay you down. Sitting. I kneel. Wrap my fingers around the tail of your sweater. Pull it up. Over your head. Another sigh.

You're thinner than I remember. Beautiful. In ways no woman can ever be.

I stand up. Lower your back slowly. Climb to bed. Your eyes demand me. Together we dress my shirt off. And we stop for a second. Then _the kiss_.

Your hands wandering around my upper body. Touching me. Your fingers tracing their way along the lines of my muscles. I shudder. You huff. Our eyes meet. I know I'm lucky. The luckiest.

We take our time. We are in no rush. Because now we know this might very well be our last time together. We should make it count.

Your hands on my hips. You sift. I hear my belt being unbuckled. A smile we share with each other. Your hands going down. My thighs. I kiss along your chest. My hands searching. For a split second we lose it. We pick up the pace. I don't have my jeans on anymore. You pant. My hands still wandering. Reaching for your waistband. You grip my thighs as I pull your pants off.

We kiss. Passionately.

I look at you. Almost asleep. I roll off of you. Carefully place my arm under your head. You curl up against me. No protest. No need to do anything. What we both need is already there. Proximity. Love. No fear. No cold. No dark. Just us. You and me.


End file.
